You will find Art Of Parenting and childcare sections in any bookstore. Although it might seem natural to raise children and that books can’t really help you relate to your child’s personality, this section has seen a growing number of people in the last few years.
Shelja Sen, a child and adolescent psychologist, and family therapist, is however confused by this type of literature. There is so much information out there about “fixing the kid.” Parenting is more than raising children. It is about growing up and becoming better people. According to the books, parents are classified according to their parenting style: permissive or laissez-faire, helicopter, drill sergeant and tiger mother, authoritarian, authoritative, democratic, etc. I didn’t know which style I was until I realized that I don’t have to fit in any one. The author of All you need is love, a book about mindful parenting, says that there is no one-size fits all approach to parenting.
She is a mother to two children, one aged 18 and the other 13, and has worked in child psychology for more than two decades. She says her own journey as a parent has helped her grow and inspired her book. She Art Of Parenting laughs and says, “I was the most confident about parenting before having children.” I have learned so much from them about accepting, love and living mindfully. This book was a great healing experience for me. It has allowed me to make a paradigm shift in my parenting and has given me deep faith in my convictions.
Shelja explains the basic concept of the book by saying, “This book can be used by all parents, grandparents and teachers; anyone who has the privilege to care for or work with children.” It addresses all aspects of children’s lives, regardless of age, ability/disability or gender. Parents feel already judged, and we don’t have to make it worse by putting them in boxes. There are many ways to parent. Each child’s wired and instilled differently will mean that each parent is wired differently.
The book focuses on five key anchors to parenting: coach, connect, care, community, and commit. They all flow from each other and are interconnected. Connect is the foundation. It’s about laying the foundation for a healthy, happy, fulfilled, joyful, and full of positive energy. Coaching is about helping children Art Of Parenting understand their unique wiring and build life skills. Caring is about taking care of ourselves to live a healthier life. Building caring communities for children is key to their success. Shelja says that commitment is about maintaining the courage and compassion to go on a wholehearted journey.”